Breakfast Buzz: Time to splurge on your mom

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The National Retail Federation reports that the average person will spend just over $100 dollars on Father's Day this year, compared to the nearly $150 dollars we will spend on mom this weekend. As with most years, the top gifts this year will be a special meal, clothing, electronics and flowers.

Warning: as you get ready for Mother's Day tomorrow, and you think about what to get mom for her special day, consider this interesting little nugget of information: if moms had to choose between their daughters and their sons, the majority would choose their daughters.

A recent survey of Canadians over the age of 55 found that 70 per cent of mothers with both a son and a daughter would choose to move in with their daughter, over their son, if they could not take care of themselves. And 65 per cent of mothers believe their daughters would be more likely than their sons to offer their homes.

I want to say this here and now for the world to read: On behalf of my sister, you are welcome to live with her anytime.

I am offended that there are some sons who would not offer a sibling’s home up for a mom to live. If it weren’t for our newly adopted farm animals, constant construction, loud noises from passing traffic, air pollution, water pollution, disconnected telephone, cable with only four channels and nothing but stairs, there’s always a spot in our spare bedroom once I get the bed fixed and the carpet fumigated. Was it vinegar that gets blood stains out, mom? I can’t remember. At least the vinegar masks the urine smell.

But I digress. Thankfully most of my humour comes from my mother.

Knowing that moms are favoring the daughters these days, sons might want to step up their game this year and splurge a little on that Mother's Day gift. According to Women's Health Magazine, nearly 1 in 2 women say their mother is their best friend. The average woman talks to her mother once a week.

I know some that talk to mom once a day, and some people who I will not name for fear of having to go into witness protection call more than once a day. Time for a hobby me thinks.

Percentage of women who tell their mom ...

• everything but sex stuff: 51%

• nothing but work and family news: 25%

• everything: 16%

• zip: 8%

This year, I have a few more friends and relatives who are still new to "the fun of parenthood". Gone are the days of high fashion, eye rolling, and the innocent arrogance of newly married youth, as they embrace what is the "joys of motherhood". Celebrity moms were asked about the moment when they realized, "Yup ... I'm a mom!"

Jennie Garth said she knew when she started leaving the house with baby vomit on her clothes and would just keep going. Kelly Rippa said she knew when she would show up to work with all sorts spit up on her sweater and would just keep working.

So I asked my Facebook friends, what was your first "Yup ... I'm a mom" moment?

• Alicia Poitras — I knew when I first laid eyes on my beautiful son after being in labour for 31 hours! If you don't realize it then, the drugs are too strong...lol :) Oh & when you start putting everything under the sun in your diaper bag....and catching vomit with your hands...that's a good one.

• Jennifer Piwniuk — For me it was when I had been sent out for some "me" time + went to go pay for my coffee + pulled out my daughters bottle out of my purse.

• Scarlet Faith Marie Leclerc-Blouin — When being spit up on, pee'd and pooped on and it doesn't bother me one bit!

• Lisa Murray — I think when we brought our son home from the hospital and I realized that my beloved cat of 7 years was ...AN ANIMAL!! The two of them, of course, became best friends, but at that moment the cat's ranking in the house sure fell.

• Samantha Meger — You know you’re a mom when the first time you go out without kids all you do is talk about them and how much you miss them.

• Charmaine Ouellette Lerch — Not the first moment, but a memorable one, bent over the toilet with a metal coat hanger breaking up your toddlers bowel movements to search for the plastic they swallowed, at the advice of the emergency room staff. Who signed up for that one?

• Joslyn Eva Lawlor — Walking around in the store entertaining my daughter in the shopping cart making funny faces and noises. I am oblivious to the spectators around me! Yup, I'm a mom!

• Julie Peloquin — When you can wipe another kids nose and not squirm too much.

• Carmela Mark Warwaruk-Perkins — When my daughters first said "mama".

• Kathleen Kretai — When you step out to do a quick errand and while you are in the store someone elses baby starts to cry and you let down just at the time you get to the till, with 2 dripping stains on your shirt you just quip without batting an eye smiling and say, I'm breastfeeding. Now you know you’re a MOM.

Thanks ladies, and thanks Kathleen.

On that note, its time for "this boob" to wish his mom, and ALL MOMS a Happy Mother’s Day!@15.6.2 sat tab turn cont:JOKE This Week "Mom Taught ME"

Mom taught me about ANTICIPATION: "Just wait until your father gets home."

Mom taught me about RECEIVING: "You're going to get it when we get home!"

Mom taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE: "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don't talk back to me!"

Mom taught me LOGIC: "If you fall out off that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the mall with me."

Mom taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE: "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

Mom taught me to THINK AHEAD: "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

Mom taught me HUMOR: "When that lawnmower cuts off your feet, don't come running to me."

Mom taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT: "Eat your vegetables or you'll never grow up."

Mom taught me about GENETICS: "You're just like your father."

Mom taught me about my ROOTS: "Do you think you were born in a barn?"

Mom taught me about the WISDOM OF AGE: "When you get to be my age, you will understand."

And last but not least, Mom taught me about JUSTICE: "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you ... Then you'll see what it's like!"

TODAY’s Birthdays

Missy Lindsay

Ashley Fisher

Rayna Reimer

Dawn Hagman

Lynette Abbie

Kyle Logan

Dawn Nicole

Jennifer Huskins Jaffray

Leslie Braybrook

Bekah Wilkinson

Corrina Canart

Audrey Collier

Michelle Yvette Langevin

Joseph Maddever

Tracy Delaurier

Missy Lindsay

Rayna Reimer

Amie Ross

Doug Wright

Marie Berard

Fiona Shingoose

Republished from the Brandon Sun print edition May 12, 2012