Author shares advice for the disconnected

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This article was published 21/02/2024 (575 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

A clinical psychologist from a small rural community in central Alberta is coming to Westman, bringing her sense of humour and sound advice to people who are feeling disconnected from everyone around them.

Dr. Jody Carrington will be at Brandon’s Western Manitoba Centennial Auditorium (WMCA) next Thursday with her presentation, “Feeling Seen: Reconnecting in a Disconnected World,” which is also the title of her third book, following “Teachers These Days” and “Kids These Days.”

“All anybody wants is to feel seen,” Carrington said. “The highest rate of suicide in your province and mine is middle-aged men, and 75 per cent of all adolescents in this moment feel lonely. They don’t feel seen, despite the fact that we think they’re so connected.”

The disconnection people are feeling, added Carrington, is one of the aftereffects of the COVID-19 pandemic, when for two years, people were separated from each other as they worked and attended school from home. People are not only disconnected, but they’re having a hard time reconnecting.

“When you understand that everybody in this world is struggling, and you have the capacity to not only change a life but save it every single day by just waving or giving somebody a compliment — we’re just walking each other home in Brandon, Manitoba. You are raising each other’s babies,” Carrington said.

The quote, “we’re just walking each other home” is one of Carrington’s favourites, she said, and is from American psychologist, spiritual teacher and author Ram Dass.

Carrington said she was drawn to the phrase because of its meaning that we do not go through life alone. Whether we’re with family, chosen family or friends, most people interact with others every day.

For people waiting for someone to solve the world’s problems, Carrington said, they need to look in the mirror.

There will be no government policy or major structural change that is going to eradicate homelessness, racism or bullying, Carrington added. It starts with “you and me doing the next best right kind thing, today.”

“Because we only have a few moments on this planet, and we feel best when we are being kind to other people. So, you don’t have to start a non-profit for homeless teenage moms. You don’t have to do that today. All I want you to do, if you can afford it, is buy somebody coffee in the lineup behind you at Tim Hortons. And if that’s not feasible, that’s OK, too.

“Wave at somebody at a stoplight like you’ve been drinking. Wave. That’s it. That’s all I want you to do. And if you do that once or twice today, I promise you your life will change,” Carrington said.

One of the community partners hosting Carrington’s visit to the Wheat City is the YWCA, said Lois Ruston, executive director of the non-profit.

The event is a fundraiser for YWCA during a time of year when Ruston, volunteers and board members are usually planning their annual signature event, the Women of Distinction awards night.

This year, it was decided to move the awards ceremony to May for “timing and operational reasons,” Ruston said, and that meant an opportunity to find a fundraiser before their year-end, which is the end of March.

“It’s nice to have an event like this to look forward to, as a reason to get together, gather, learn and laugh,” said Ruston.

The YWCA exists to empower women and to provide a safe space for individuals and their children who are fleeing family violence.

It operates the Westman Women’s Shelter, and staff members work with survivors to rebuild their lives, while educating and advocating for a future in which women are empowered and free of violence.

The money raised from Dr. Carrington’s event “will allow us to continue to operate and run the women’s shelter and do our educational and prevention programming — all the work that we do,” said Ruston.

“I really feel passionately about bringing opportunities as a women-serving organization for all women to gather and learn.

“And one of the goals I had when I joined the organization last year was to create more inspirational and educational opportunities for our community, and Dr. Carrington’s event isn’t just for women,” Ruston said.

Thanks to a provincial training grant the YWCA applied for and received, staff members will have the opportunity to attend a private session with Dr. Carrington the day after her public event.

“We have a really fantastic team of people, and we operate a 24-7-365 crisis facility, so that’s not easy work. It can be really heavy heart work,” Ruston said.

“So, to have Dr. Carrington spend her morning with our staff, I think, is going to be really, really special, and I hope it has laughter — because of that heavy heart work, it’s also good to have some laughs.”

Dr. Jody Carrington is scheduled to speak on Feb. 29 at WMCA from 7-9 p.m. For more information call 204-728-9510 or visit https://www.wmca.ca/.

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