Stroke survivor embraces Christmas tradition

WAWANESA – A Westman resident has returned a Christmas tree to his living room for the first time in six years after gaining a reminder about the value of life.

Neil Friesen, a 76-year-old local of Wawanesa, has a seven-foot-tall tree in his living room this year, decorated with ornaments and supplied with water. The effort follows after Friesen survived a stroke this summer, and then survived a subsequent heart bypass surgery in October.

The returning Christmas tradition comes as Friesen looks at the world with new eyes.

“Anything like a near death experience, you never know how close you are,” Friesen told the Sun from his living room. “It happens so quick. And there could be a funeral. You know what I mean?”

“That could have been my last supper.”

As he recovers from the health emergency, the Wawanesa resident has had time to reflect. He said he has been inspired towards stronger beliefs of family, friends and loved ones.

Friesen was looking forward to seeing about 60 family members at their annual Christmas gathering, when the Sun visited in early December.

“We never know when we see them the last time,” he said. “I think you value each time, and the family time, more.”

In July, Friesen was sitting in church when a book fell from his grip. He was unable to retrieve the book off the floor — his thumb would not move, his arm was limp.

The man was in the Brandon Regional Health Centre within roughly an hour, and after being treated, he regained use of his hand the same day.

Doctors believed that blood passed through a hole in Friesen’s heart, skipping the journey for oxygenation through the lungs. The blood instead went straight to his brain and caused a stroke.

Friesen chose heart bypass surgery to treat the condition this fall. He spent eight weeks recovering from that, up until early December.

Janet Hamilton, Friesen’s daughter, said the experience of the health crisis, and driving her father to appointments and seeing him through surgery, has reinforced a belief of hers.

“Life is too short,” she said. “Not knowing what each of us has in store, it makes me not put off those things. If dad says ‘Let’s go for tea,’ I don’t put off those things.”

The daughter, now in her 50s, sees her dad several times a week. During the Christmas holidays, they will spend time with their extended family, and also dine together with her three brothers and a friend of Friesen’s.

Hamilton said her father appears to be living the same philosophy as her. Especially following the health crises this year, she thinks he’s been more open to relationships.

“It feels like he is willing to make deeper connections with everybody,” she said. “He’s really allowed time now for anybody who comes to his door.”

Jeff Friesen, Neil’s son, said that the situation was a little scary before and after the surgery. The experience serves to bring the family members closer together, he said.

The father and son have been working on a home restoration project at an abandoned 115-year-old property in town. They’ll get back to it this year, Jeff said, as Neil regains his strength.

Looking ahead at the recovery process, and life afterwards, Neil said he has some takeaways.

“I think the most part is, I value friendships more deeply and appreciate them,” he said. “If someone invites me to a birthday party or something, I better have a good reason not to go and spend time with friends.”

“Just take the opportunity to say, ‘Hi, how are you doing?’ Life is a precious thing.”

During a heavy snowfall, with the arrival of winter on the snowy hills in the rural Westman town, Friesen tosses a handful of peanuts on his bird feeder. He offers a peanut to his dog, Dutch, covered in snowflakes, who jumps up for a bite.

In the trees nearby, Blue Jays watch eagerly, waiting to return for a snack.

“You value and appreciate life more. The blessings,” Friesen said earlier that morning. “The little things that are there every day, that you don’t notice when you’re busy.”

“As a young person you go through life, you never think that death is in your books,” he said. “Death happens to everybody, sooner or later.”

» cmcdowell@brandonsun.com